The Power of Stoicism: Why Doing Hard Things Shapes Who You Become

The reason I believe we must continually do hard things is because we never know which of those hard things will ultimately shape our future. That truth comes to life in the story of Admiral James Stockdale, a man who embodied stoicism in its purest form.

Stockdale’s experience as a prisoner of war for over seven years during the Vietnam War is one of the greatest examples of how stoicism — the ancient philosophy of resilience, discipline, and control — can help us endure the unimaginable.

The Stockdale Story and the Essence of Stoicism

Stockdale was shot down over North Vietnam on September 9, 1965. As his jet went down, he was forced to eject and parachute into enemy territory. He was captured, tortured, and held as a prisoner of war for over seven years.

During his captivity, he survived not through blind optimism or hopeless pessimism — but through what’s now known as the Stockdale Paradox: maintaining unwavering faith that you will prevail while confronting the brutal facts of your reality.

That’s stoicism in action — meeting hardship with rationality, not emotion.

Stoicism as Preparation for the Unknown

What fascinates me most about Stockdale is how he got there. Before his capture, he was a rising Navy commander studying at Stanford, pursuing a master’s in international relations. It wasn’t part of his plan to become a philosopher — but he enrolled in philosophy courses anyway.

And that’s where he discovered Epictetus, the crippled Roman slave who taught that suffering and control are two sides of the same coin. Stockdale became obsessed with the teachings of Epictetus and dove deep into stoic philosophy.

He didn’t know it then, but those lessons would become his lifeline.

When his plane was hit and he ejected, he said to himself:

“I’m leaving the world of technology and entering the world of Epictetus.”

That level of awareness — that ability to switch instantly into acceptance and action — is the very heart of stoicism. It’s the understanding that while we can’t control what happens, we can always control how we respond.

Stoicism in Practice

Stockdale’s survival wasn’t luck. It was disciplined thinking. Every day, he followed a routine: pacing his cell, doing pushups, tapping messages to other prisoners, reciting Epictetus.

He refused to let his captors use him for propaganda, even going so far as to disfigure his own face. He made choices rooted in stoic virtue — courage, temperance, justice, and wisdom — even in the face of unimaginable pain.

The lesson is simple but powerful: the time to train your mind is before the crisis comes.

Stockdale didn’t learn stoicism under torture — he learned it years earlier in a classroom. Because when hardship strikes, you don’t rise to the occasion; you fall to your level of preparation. Stoicism was his preparation.

Why Doing Hard Things Matters

This story reinforces one of my favorite quotes from Seneca:

“If you would not have a man flinch when the crisis comes, train him before it comes.”

That’s why I believe in doing hard things. The “hard thing” could be something as simple as finishing a workout you don’t want to do, having a tough conversation, or waking up early when you don’t feel like it. These daily moments of resistance are how you train for the unknown.

We all have the option to check the box or push a little harder — to live comfortably or live with discipline. And stoicism is the philosophy that reminds us that discipline, discomfort, and effort are the path to strength and peace.

Every time you choose the harder path, you’re shaping your character for the moment life tests you most.

My Challenge to You

Every day, write this in your journal:

“What hard thing will I do today?”

It doesn’t have to be huge — it just has to push against your own desire for comfort. Doing this daily, over years and decades, builds the kind of resilience that stoicism is all about.

You never know which hard thing will become your version of Stockdale’s philosophy class — the one that shapes your destiny when life hits hardest.

Do hard things. Practice stoicism. Try harder.

Show Notes

• 00:30 – Why we must keep doing hard things and how stoicism prepares us for the unknown.

• 01:20 – The story of Admiral James Stockdale’s capture and the origins of the Stockdale Paradox.

• 03:10 – How studying philosophy and Epictetus introduced Stockdale to stoicism.

• 04:45 – “Leaving the world of technology and entering the world of Epictetus.”

• 06:10 – How disciplined thinking and routine kept Stockdale alive.

• 07:30 – The importance of mental preparation before crisis hits.

• 08:45 – Stoicism and Seneca’s wisdom on training before hardship.

• 09:50 – Why doing hard things every day builds strength and character.

• 10:45 – How to apply stoicism: journaling, discipline, and daily practice.

• 11:30 – Final thoughts on choosing difficulty, building grit, and living with purpose.